03-05-2023, 03:00 AM
SPORTS HEADLINES
Hockey
EIGHT OUT OF EIGHT: ALL EIGHT URALICAN TEAMS STILL IN EUROPE
It seems the eight teams that made Europe's three international tournaments from the 2021 season are all still very much alive, even if two of them dropped from the Champions League to Europa. Valeri Karpin reports:
"It's been amazing to see just how well Uralican teams have done in this year's major tournaments. All four of our Champions League participants were involved in the group stage although Fakel Kirov had to go through a round of qualifiers to get there while maintaining their red-hot Bolakliiga run and fighting to advance in the Kanslerinkilpi. They very nearly made the Kanslerinkilpi finals this year, losing a heartbreaker of a semi to eventual winners Dinamo Arkhangel'sk, and everyone already knows how they fared in the Bolakliiga, finishing 2022 as the champs by the slimmest of margins over 9-time champs SiPS. And as their league form improved, so too did their form in the Champions League. Although they entered as the four Uralican seed, they are one of the two teams still in the Champions League, the other being SiPS, with 2021 Bolakliiga champs Udmurtia Izhevsk disappointing by losing to Rubin Kazan' from Bashkorto-Tatarstan before a more expected loss to Catalonia champs Barcelona and finishing third in the group, having already bested Hapoel Tel Aviv and Lille. Joining them was Uralica's third seed, Dinamo Arkhangel'sk, who lost a close one to Bayern München and later AC Milan, to drop down to the Europa after two wins over Viktoria Plzeň and another two over cold-streak-hampered Club Brugge.
But the two Uralican droppers-down turned things around fairly quickly last week. Udmurtia won a close and entertaining match against Turkish runners-up Beşiktaş, 3-2, and Dinamo Arkhangel'sk absolutely mauled Royal Antwerp to the tune of 6-0 (4-0 at home and 2-0 away). They joined a third Uralican team - Group F runners-up FK Chuvashia - who also won their knockout round matchup, besting Newcastle United 2-0 (1-0 wins in both matches). Amkar Perm has been on fire in Europe this year and is hoping to ride that momentum into the Bolakliiga season and the Kanslerinkilpi - they have won every Europa League matchup, having started in the group stage and beaten Liverpool, Panathinaikos, Trabzonspor, and Sparta Praha twice each. What's more, there are no Uralican vs. Uralican matches in the Round of 16 (other teams entered according to bracket):
Udmurtia Izhevsk vs. FK Rostov (RUS)
Valencia CF (CAT) vs. Bayer Leverkusen (GER)
Dinamo Arkhangel'sk vs. Feyenoord (NED)
FK Chuvashia vs. Arsenal (ENG)
GFK Krasnodar (TKK) vs. Galatasaray (TUR)
Sporting CP (POR) vs. Olympique Lyonnais (FRA)
Amkar Perm' vs. Red Bull Salzburg (AUB)
Hibernian (SCO) vs. Hajduk Split (CRO)
It is impossible for all four Uralican teams to be in the final four, but there can be as many as three. It is possible that Dinamo and Chuvashia will meet in the quarterfinals.
And then there's the oft-neglected Conference League, which right now is being dominated by two Uralican clubs. Neither Zavod Ural Solikamsk nor Saransk-based FK Mordovia have dropped a point and are already through to the last 16, dodging the knockout round. Most pundits doubt that either team will lose their match in that; ZavU has FK Anzhi-Qala from Dagestan (who won a dramatic penalty shootout over Legia Warszawa but are said to be "out of gas") and Mordovia has Europa League droppers-down Malmö FF.
Of course, it wouldn't be fair if I left you hanging on the Champions League matches. SiPS' next tilt is against last year's German Bundesliga champs Borussia Dortmund (OOC note: remember that in this timeline Munich is in Austro-Bavaria!) and Fakel Kirov is lined up to face surprise 21-22 La Liga runners-up Real Betis. Many of the "giants" are still very much alive - Manchester United, Real Madrid, Barcelona, PSG, Juventus, Tottenham Hotspur, Zenit St. Petersburg, Celtic, and so forth. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't proud of our good Uralican boys having a 100% retention rate up to this point!
SURPRISE CHALLENGE CUP OF ASIA-PACIFIC HOST ANNOUNCED
With so much controversy over the hosting of the IIHF's Challenge Cup (proper) of Asia-Pacific caused by the Balochistan War and Persia's subsequent backing out of the hosting role, one would've thought all the surprises were over. But word out of Tajikistan came last month that the Tajiks were going to snub the role this year as well to focus money on refugee support. Only two other nations were said to have the infrastructure needed to host the tournament. One was Oman. They turned it down as they had already applied to do it next year. The other, our surprise hosts this year... of all countries, Tyva! Yes, Tyva has a modern, decent-sized arena in its capital city Kyzyl as well as sufficient lodging for several thousand away fans, and they had already made arrangements for security, sending out requests to Siberia and Uralica for help.
"It might seem like small beans to the bigshots," said Tyvan captain, leading scorer, and all-around sporting celebrity Dashdemir Aydynool, "but this is huge news for our little country. You do realize that only around 350 thousand people live here total, right? So for us to welcome eleven other countries' representatives into our humble abode is quite a treat. It's actually the first major team sporting event this country has ever hosted that doesn't involve horseback riding, weightlifting, and/or archery. So we are already making plans to expose them to as much Tyvan culture as we can get away with."
Culture
Indeed, Tyva is a fairly obscure country to those outside the NCIS. Its population is the tenth-smallest of any sovereign nation (five of the nine nations behind it are island nations) and the smallest of any NCIS nation. It is highly rural, with over half of its population based in towns and villages dotting the country, and only four other settlements are over ten thousand people - besides the obvious Kyzyl, which accounts for around 125 thousand people, there is its primary discontiguous suburb, Kaa-Xem, which has around twenty thousand people, Ak-Dovurak, the only city not in the Yenisey Valley, which has around 12 500, Shagonar at around eleven thousand, and Çadaara, which barely comes in over ten thousand per the last census. It is also the third-sparsest-populated sovereign state in the world, with only 1.90 people per square kilometre, ranking it ahead of only fellow NCISers Chukotka (0.44) and Saharan nation Azawad (1.47).
But it does have some fame on the international scene for its culture, which has been described as transitional between Turkic (as is the language they speak) and Mongolic (since they border on Mongolia and Tyvin culture has a lot of artifacts that are similar to counterparts in Mongol culture, such as the similarity between the Tyvin igil and the Mongol morin khuur, both bowed-string instruments with long, narrow necks). Musicians and students of phonetics are generally the most interested in the culture thanks to their unique throat singing styles, which have been taken around the world thanks to groups such as Huun-Huur-Tu, Yat-Kha, and Chirgilchin. It is one of the few countries in the world where the prevalent religion is an indigenous one - although Russian Orthodox presence is still there, the majority of ethnic Tyvins still practice a syncretistic mix of Buddhism and Tengriism called "Tyvan Folk Buddhism." There is also a small Protestant presence, primarily in metro Kyzyl and Ak-Dovurak. Almost the entire population is at least bilingual in Russian and Tyvan, and many of the more highly-educated people will speak Mongolian, Mandarin, Korean, and even English. Anyone not Tyvin or Russian will speak their mother tongue as well.
Historically nomadic, many Tyvin people still practice semi-nomadism and have post office boxes in the major centres. Sometimes this mail has to be flown in to post offices as large parts of the eastern districts are hard - in the winter, impossible - to access by road. But one fortunate thing about the northeast during the warmer months is that the vast majority of the country has access to the Yenisey River and its two major tributaries (the Greater Yenisey and the Lesser Yenisey) which meet at Kyzyl. So shipping by small boat is a major boon for the economy and can aid both the delivery of mail to towns such as Doora-Khem and Kungurtug, and the movement of any semi-nomads who want to relocate outside of the district.
About nine percent of the population is non-Tyvin, and while they are primarily Russian (8 percent of the population), there are also Mongols, Buryats, Oirats, Khakas, and even a few Yeniseyans present in the latest census (taken last year). Just remember, "Tyvan" is the nationality and the language, "Tyvin" is the ethnic group!
Sport
The most popular sports in Tyva are cross-country skiing, archery, horseback riding, and (much to the delight of us Uralicans) bandy, with ice hockey starting to gain ground. They rank ninth out of forty-two ranked nations in the current World Bandy rankings (Uralica is presently atop these rankings) and their best finish in any tournament was fifth in 2018. They have never hosted the World Bandy Championships but they have hosted exhibition matches - indeed in the same arena that is going to host next month's tournament! They are also decent in combat sport and weightlifting, although nobody quite expected women's middleweight MMA fighter Buyana Kulaar to come away with the silver medal in 2020! But without question their finest moment in any Olympics was cross-country skier Aldynay Xündüskis winning gold in women's free sprint (she also won bronze in the 15km skiathlon). Kulaar and Xündüskis are without question Tyva's favourite homegrown athletes, although amongst men, it's the aforementioned Aydynool, who also happens to be the best-known Tyvan athlete outside of Tyva because of his play with the recently-promoted Juganvar Stags of the UIHL-1. His stats this season have actually been pretty good, as even his biggest critics have noted that his offensive skills have been refined even relative to last season. He is on pace for 16 goals and 35 points, if the stats geeks are right, and his KHL drafting team, Avangard Omsk, is having second thoughts about trading his rights to Udmurtia Izhevsk!
Final thoughts
I have in fact travelled to Tyva, and although it may seem a little "backwards" to someone used to a more urbanized scenario, Kyzyl is a relatively modern city, but what's more important is the beauty, richness, and hospitality of Tyvan culture. It may have been on short notice, but I think this year's Challenge Cup of Asia's hosting change will be a surprising success!
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EIGHT OUT OF EIGHT: ALL EIGHT URALICAN TEAMS STILL IN EUROPE
It seems the eight teams that made Europe's three international tournaments from the 2021 season are all still very much alive, even if two of them dropped from the Champions League to Europa. Valeri Karpin reports:
"It's been amazing to see just how well Uralican teams have done in this year's major tournaments. All four of our Champions League participants were involved in the group stage although Fakel Kirov had to go through a round of qualifiers to get there while maintaining their red-hot Bolakliiga run and fighting to advance in the Kanslerinkilpi. They very nearly made the Kanslerinkilpi finals this year, losing a heartbreaker of a semi to eventual winners Dinamo Arkhangel'sk, and everyone already knows how they fared in the Bolakliiga, finishing 2022 as the champs by the slimmest of margins over 9-time champs SiPS. And as their league form improved, so too did their form in the Champions League. Although they entered as the four Uralican seed, they are one of the two teams still in the Champions League, the other being SiPS, with 2021 Bolakliiga champs Udmurtia Izhevsk disappointing by losing to Rubin Kazan' from Bashkorto-Tatarstan before a more expected loss to Catalonia champs Barcelona and finishing third in the group, having already bested Hapoel Tel Aviv and Lille. Joining them was Uralica's third seed, Dinamo Arkhangel'sk, who lost a close one to Bayern München and later AC Milan, to drop down to the Europa after two wins over Viktoria Plzeň and another two over cold-streak-hampered Club Brugge.
But the two Uralican droppers-down turned things around fairly quickly last week. Udmurtia won a close and entertaining match against Turkish runners-up Beşiktaş, 3-2, and Dinamo Arkhangel'sk absolutely mauled Royal Antwerp to the tune of 6-0 (4-0 at home and 2-0 away). They joined a third Uralican team - Group F runners-up FK Chuvashia - who also won their knockout round matchup, besting Newcastle United 2-0 (1-0 wins in both matches). Amkar Perm has been on fire in Europe this year and is hoping to ride that momentum into the Bolakliiga season and the Kanslerinkilpi - they have won every Europa League matchup, having started in the group stage and beaten Liverpool, Panathinaikos, Trabzonspor, and Sparta Praha twice each. What's more, there are no Uralican vs. Uralican matches in the Round of 16 (other teams entered according to bracket):
Udmurtia Izhevsk vs. FK Rostov (RUS)
Valencia CF (CAT) vs. Bayer Leverkusen (GER)
Dinamo Arkhangel'sk vs. Feyenoord (NED)
FK Chuvashia vs. Arsenal (ENG)
GFK Krasnodar (TKK) vs. Galatasaray (TUR)
Sporting CP (POR) vs. Olympique Lyonnais (FRA)
Amkar Perm' vs. Red Bull Salzburg (AUB)
Hibernian (SCO) vs. Hajduk Split (CRO)
It is impossible for all four Uralican teams to be in the final four, but there can be as many as three. It is possible that Dinamo and Chuvashia will meet in the quarterfinals.
And then there's the oft-neglected Conference League, which right now is being dominated by two Uralican clubs. Neither Zavod Ural Solikamsk nor Saransk-based FK Mordovia have dropped a point and are already through to the last 16, dodging the knockout round. Most pundits doubt that either team will lose their match in that; ZavU has FK Anzhi-Qala from Dagestan (who won a dramatic penalty shootout over Legia Warszawa but are said to be "out of gas") and Mordovia has Europa League droppers-down Malmö FF.
Of course, it wouldn't be fair if I left you hanging on the Champions League matches. SiPS' next tilt is against last year's German Bundesliga champs Borussia Dortmund (OOC note: remember that in this timeline Munich is in Austro-Bavaria!) and Fakel Kirov is lined up to face surprise 21-22 La Liga runners-up Real Betis. Many of the "giants" are still very much alive - Manchester United, Real Madrid, Barcelona, PSG, Juventus, Tottenham Hotspur, Zenit St. Petersburg, Celtic, and so forth. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't proud of our good Uralican boys having a 100% retention rate up to this point!
SURPRISE CHALLENGE CUP OF ASIA-PACIFIC HOST ANNOUNCED
With so much controversy over the hosting of the IIHF's Challenge Cup (proper) of Asia-Pacific caused by the Balochistan War and Persia's subsequent backing out of the hosting role, one would've thought all the surprises were over. But word out of Tajikistan came last month that the Tajiks were going to snub the role this year as well to focus money on refugee support. Only two other nations were said to have the infrastructure needed to host the tournament. One was Oman. They turned it down as they had already applied to do it next year. The other, our surprise hosts this year... of all countries, Tyva! Yes, Tyva has a modern, decent-sized arena in its capital city Kyzyl as well as sufficient lodging for several thousand away fans, and they had already made arrangements for security, sending out requests to Siberia and Uralica for help.
"It might seem like small beans to the bigshots," said Tyvan captain, leading scorer, and all-around sporting celebrity Dashdemir Aydynool, "but this is huge news for our little country. You do realize that only around 350 thousand people live here total, right? So for us to welcome eleven other countries' representatives into our humble abode is quite a treat. It's actually the first major team sporting event this country has ever hosted that doesn't involve horseback riding, weightlifting, and/or archery. So we are already making plans to expose them to as much Tyvan culture as we can get away with."
Culture
Indeed, Tyva is a fairly obscure country to those outside the NCIS. Its population is the tenth-smallest of any sovereign nation (five of the nine nations behind it are island nations) and the smallest of any NCIS nation. It is highly rural, with over half of its population based in towns and villages dotting the country, and only four other settlements are over ten thousand people - besides the obvious Kyzyl, which accounts for around 125 thousand people, there is its primary discontiguous suburb, Kaa-Xem, which has around twenty thousand people, Ak-Dovurak, the only city not in the Yenisey Valley, which has around 12 500, Shagonar at around eleven thousand, and Çadaara, which barely comes in over ten thousand per the last census. It is also the third-sparsest-populated sovereign state in the world, with only 1.90 people per square kilometre, ranking it ahead of only fellow NCISers Chukotka (0.44) and Saharan nation Azawad (1.47).
But it does have some fame on the international scene for its culture, which has been described as transitional between Turkic (as is the language they speak) and Mongolic (since they border on Mongolia and Tyvin culture has a lot of artifacts that are similar to counterparts in Mongol culture, such as the similarity between the Tyvin igil and the Mongol morin khuur, both bowed-string instruments with long, narrow necks). Musicians and students of phonetics are generally the most interested in the culture thanks to their unique throat singing styles, which have been taken around the world thanks to groups such as Huun-Huur-Tu, Yat-Kha, and Chirgilchin. It is one of the few countries in the world where the prevalent religion is an indigenous one - although Russian Orthodox presence is still there, the majority of ethnic Tyvins still practice a syncretistic mix of Buddhism and Tengriism called "Tyvan Folk Buddhism." There is also a small Protestant presence, primarily in metro Kyzyl and Ak-Dovurak. Almost the entire population is at least bilingual in Russian and Tyvan, and many of the more highly-educated people will speak Mongolian, Mandarin, Korean, and even English. Anyone not Tyvin or Russian will speak their mother tongue as well.
Historically nomadic, many Tyvin people still practice semi-nomadism and have post office boxes in the major centres. Sometimes this mail has to be flown in to post offices as large parts of the eastern districts are hard - in the winter, impossible - to access by road. But one fortunate thing about the northeast during the warmer months is that the vast majority of the country has access to the Yenisey River and its two major tributaries (the Greater Yenisey and the Lesser Yenisey) which meet at Kyzyl. So shipping by small boat is a major boon for the economy and can aid both the delivery of mail to towns such as Doora-Khem and Kungurtug, and the movement of any semi-nomads who want to relocate outside of the district.
About nine percent of the population is non-Tyvin, and while they are primarily Russian (8 percent of the population), there are also Mongols, Buryats, Oirats, Khakas, and even a few Yeniseyans present in the latest census (taken last year). Just remember, "Tyvan" is the nationality and the language, "Tyvin" is the ethnic group!
Sport
The most popular sports in Tyva are cross-country skiing, archery, horseback riding, and (much to the delight of us Uralicans) bandy, with ice hockey starting to gain ground. They rank ninth out of forty-two ranked nations in the current World Bandy rankings (Uralica is presently atop these rankings) and their best finish in any tournament was fifth in 2018. They have never hosted the World Bandy Championships but they have hosted exhibition matches - indeed in the same arena that is going to host next month's tournament! They are also decent in combat sport and weightlifting, although nobody quite expected women's middleweight MMA fighter Buyana Kulaar to come away with the silver medal in 2020! But without question their finest moment in any Olympics was cross-country skier Aldynay Xündüskis winning gold in women's free sprint (she also won bronze in the 15km skiathlon). Kulaar and Xündüskis are without question Tyva's favourite homegrown athletes, although amongst men, it's the aforementioned Aydynool, who also happens to be the best-known Tyvan athlete outside of Tyva because of his play with the recently-promoted Juganvar Stags of the UIHL-1. His stats this season have actually been pretty good, as even his biggest critics have noted that his offensive skills have been refined even relative to last season. He is on pace for 16 goals and 35 points, if the stats geeks are right, and his KHL drafting team, Avangard Omsk, is having second thoughts about trading his rights to Udmurtia Izhevsk!
Final thoughts
I have in fact travelled to Tyva, and although it may seem a little "backwards" to someone used to a more urbanized scenario, Kyzyl is a relatively modern city, but what's more important is the beauty, richness, and hospitality of Tyvan culture. It may have been on short notice, but I think this year's Challenge Cup of Asia's hosting change will be a surprising success!
Spammers Beware! I will destroy you by the POWAH of the JARK SIDE! ALL SPAMMERS WILL BE EXTERMINATED ON SIGHT.
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(06-11-2022, 10:13 PM)Kyng Wrote: I love how [Abacab] has a track with a section named "Lurker", when the album title itself looks like Lurker's attempt to spell "Abacus" or something .
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