Do you prefer being single or in a Relationship?

[Pyrite]

So, for me, it's not really a matter of 'preference'. I feel like there are pros and cons to either situation, so I am content to be in whatever situation I am in. Right now, I'm fine with being single. But, if a girl comes into my life at some point, I'm sure I'd be totally alright with that, if a bit stressed by it!!

Humans are innately social creatures. I think the satisfaction of being with somebody you genuinely love, and who loves you back just as much, and sharing that special bond... is stronger than any pros being single can net you. 

See, the thing is I currently have a fair number of friends who I genuinely love, and who genuinely love me. Obviously not in the way that a special someone would, but I do think friendship is massively underrated. But like I said, it's something I would embrace were it to happen, but also something I'm not going to beat myself up about not being in.

[Naiwen]

You can keep trying to convince yourself that, I guess.  

I also can't feel romantic love, I'm an asexual aromantic. Don't believe in that notion. To the 3 little words : "I love you", I feel nothing for. That's purely your belief on romance and that's mine. I'm respecting your opinion but please respect mine too. Thank you.  

I'm not being that 'You just haven't met the right one yet' guy or anything like that as I don't know your thoughts, feelings or general experience. But tbh, I can relate to the words 'I love you' meaning nothing, and not invoking any kind of feeling for the first 20 years of my life.
But then, I met the right one, and I had that moment where it made sense.

I'm not saying we're cut from the same cloth. I'm just putting out into the universe that the the words come with the feeling, not the feeling with the words. 

It's just I can't feel it myself so yeah. Never have for anyone at all. Lets just leave it at that, shall we? So yes, being single is my personal path to joy and freedom, I am an asocial person, i have this personality disorder, suffering from social phobia, so I generally don't seek out any socializing, except the "safe" type, meaning with co-workers, my mental healthcare and physical healthcare team, professionals from all walks and fellow patients from my clinic. I have many mental illnesses that are hindering me from enjoying being in a relationship. Plus having PTSD from traumatic relationship experiences and etc. So yeah, I just find them too much a bother to me. My only comfort and solace is being with myself. So yeah. I truly do enjoy being alone irl.

[Nilla]

I haven't been single for a long time, so I can't really say. I mean, there was that brief time when I was single-ish when my ex and I split but it didn't take me long to realize I was in love with Tim, so I think that I'd much rather be in a relationship. Plus, I get lonely a lot so having my partner around helps with that. Funny how when you find the right person, love is so easy to do and you can't believe how rough it was for you before and your whole perspective changes. Now if I were still with my ex, I was so miserable I probably would have answered this differently.

[Eremurus]

I haven't been single for a long time, so I can't really say. I mean, there was that brief time when I was single-ish when my ex and I split but it didn't take me long to realize I was in love with Tim, so I think that I'd much rather be in a relationship. Plus, I get lonely a lot so having my partner around helps with that. Funny how when you find the right person, love is so easy to do and you can't believe how rough it was for you before and your whole perspective changes. Now if I were still with my ex, I was so miserable I probably would have answered this differently.

Bingo.

[Shiny Star]

It's weird that you made this thread because I was thinking about making the exact one yesterday. 

Anyway, I generally prefer to be single as life can get chaotic and I find it so hard to let people in. It's nice to have the fluffy cute moments with people but I understand that it's got to be with the right person and you've got to be emotionally secure etc. Relationships can be great in their prime though if it's healthy of course. Literally can be cloud nine sometimes and nothing is better. Heartbreak on the other hand. No. 

And @Naiwen, identify how you feel at the current moment, sexuality can be fluid and you can identify with what makes feel you comfortable in the now. It can always change later and that's okay if it does. It's a different experience for everyone but I have a friend that has been through a lot and she has that asexual view point.

[Deleted User 35]

Single. Too much dedication.

[Jarkko]

Never actually been "in a relationship" as it were. My counsellor thinks it's a good idea for me, but the problem is, I've dropped the ball on a couple potentials already (one has since married, and the other... no idea where she is other than that she is back in Austria now) and other than those two, the only other person within reasonable distance of me that has been interested in me (that I know of - I'm pretty clueless unless she's pretty open about it) - even though she's a friend, her sense of humour drives me bonkers sometimes and she likes the drink a little too much.

[Deleted User 80]

At this point in my life, I would like to be in a relationship or have many friendships.  I have spent most of my adult life alone, except for a 4.5 year period when I was in a relationship.  My ex walked out on me one day and moved in with someone else.  No reason whatsoever.  Ex married this person 7 months later.  That was 20₊ years ago, and my only “romantic” relationship.

I find as I age that I tire of being alone.  I would settle for a good friendship with others.  I am not set on a full-time relationship, as I do not do well with other people’s drama 24/7.  I do not require a physical or sexual relationship.  I have drifted towards asexuality over the years, and I am fine with that.   

I am a caretaker.  I take care of people.  I have always found it difficult to make friends.  I may be jaded enough to not put up with other people’s sh*t or drama.  I just won’t.  Probably why friends are more difficult to come by. 

Unless people have walked in my shoes, lived my life, and suffered my hardships and challenges, they are in no position to judge or advise me.  

[Deleted User 8]

I guess most of us here are singletons. I'm part of the majority too.

[Ann]

I’ve been married for more years probably than most of you have been alive - 46!

your replies touched me in your honesty.